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Wind Spirits

Feb. 2nd, 2004 12:30 am catching up

well here i am. it seems like ages since my last post, i felt a need for catch up session is needed.
let's see, the big 3-0 is coming,
a very dear friend will be leaving (though it's still a few months before he does, but i know i will miss him so),
new friends are coming into my life, still thinking of dear old friends (some still here, others gone because of some reason or another),
experiencing strange new things (not saying anything here ;>),
and am dreaming of stars again, in the dark sky,
with a certain distinct feeling coming over me whenever i dream of them.
a sense of deep calm like when you're walking on the beach at night with wind in your hair,
and the smell of distant shores wafting in the air.
a sort of expectation at the back of your head, nagging at you. yearning for something uncertain, yet hopeful.
like seeing clearly in the dark.
only the moon and the stars to light your way..
the wind is cold but the heart is warm.. and content..


the rest will come in future posts.

cheers luvs!

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Jan. 30th, 2004 02:41 am

it is a funny thing to want love.
if you go and try to run after it, the more you get closer to it the farther it flies away from you.
if you just sit there and decide to wait for it to happen, it'll just hover near you, teasing you, but not go near you.
why is it such a big thing, this thing called love?
and mind you, i've been told that there are many forms of love. as if plain love wasn't enough already to keep you on your toes. heh...
is love real? i mean is it really?
or do we just associate it with something that gives our egos a boost?
or as a salve to soothe the itch?
or to fill a need, something psychological or spiritual perhaps?
i look around, even in the most perfect of relationships as one might deem them,
i see the pain that needs to be soothed, the anger to be calmed, and mostly fear...
fear of being alone...
left out...
this need for reassurance that another living soul wants them, needs them...
but always.. always never enough.
there's never enough for anyone... there's never enough of somebody for anyone...

honestly, i don't know where i'm going with this. hmph.. sometimes i amuse myself.

but let me just imagine that i know what i'm talking about.
and to carry on with what i started here, let's say i wanted to say this:
that even with this realization, this "epiphany" if i may so eloquently add,
i also know that i am a part of this machination, this beast.
and at best i may fall into any one of the definitions that i have stated above. but, with what i'm privy too, i also know that i am much more than this. i have to be, but how do you do this? i don't exactly know how.
all i know is i have to love less of love's shadow that most of us make it stand for but more of the substance that it should have been made of....

or maybe am just sleepy...

g'nyt luvs!

Current Mood: sillyamused, pensive, groggy
Current Music: dream a little dream of me...

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Nov. 25th, 2003 02:53 am My inner Dragon

I am a A Ruby Dragon!

Hey, I took the http://dragonhame.com online Inner Dragon quiz and found out I am a Ruby Dragon on the inside.

In the war between good and evil, Ruby Dragons take the side of the noble and good....
When it comes to the powers of Chaos vs. those of Law and Order, your inner dragon walks a fine line between Law and Chaos....
As far as magical tendancies, Your inner dragon has the ability to conquer the world of magic, but it will not be easy....
During combat situations, a true Ruby Dragon prefers to defeat opponents by the use of spells and other tactics....
The Ruby Dragon makes its home in lush forests with lots of flowers and abundant animal life. They treasure colorful things and bright sunshine.'
Appearing as a translucent ruby, it is a beautiful thing to see one as one flies overhead. The suns ray's pass through the dragon's body creating a deep red shadow. It's scales magnify the suns rays into bright ruby red beams to highlight this effect.'
Ruby Dragons harbor a great thirst for travel and foreign places, but always long to come home, for their home is their castle and refuge. A Ruby Dragons temper is fired up by injustice, and when a Ruby Dragon feels it is right, it is terribly difficult to change its opinion. Ruby Dragons appreciate creativity and artful thinking.
This Dragons favorite elements are: Rubies, Sunlight, and Wisdom


Current Mood: relaxedrelaxed

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Jul. 14th, 2003 08:32 pm

You are Justin.

Which Queer As Folk Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

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Jun. 27th, 2003 08:42 pm


...the wind touches everything
and sings the shape
of the world's soul...


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Jun. 24th, 2003 07:10 pm

  our hunger for affection
often blinds us to the
cares of others, which more often than not,
the notice of which
is what satiates that
which we hunger for...

Every one of us have a choice
and everything will play out
as it should be
I am neither happy nor sad,
only curious as to how it will all end,
but i won't live that long, sadly...

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Jun. 10th, 2003 02:17 am ... ways of the wind...








What needs, wants not I have.
But like air for breath I grasp at, holds death.
For want i need not, but crave for the cord,
the coil that binds my heart to the soul of the world.


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Jun. 8th, 2003 04:16 am Test

blue is the sky, so white clouds float
amidst a kind sun.
so beautiful without, joy rings throughout.
so dark within, storm clouds unseen,
amidst a black heart.

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May. 25th, 2003 11:59 pm Muri Die Vento...

* talked with soulsoother... the walls have fallen! hands clasped hands again, and my brother has returned.. thank you soulsoother... for heeding the calls i threw to the wind...
* talked with domini... and domini... for the lifeline, i am grateful... we shod do that often. :)
* talked with the Bug... Bug.. ei! u do irritate me sometimes, heck most times, but that's why u are so dear to me! hehehe
* talked with bigF... i just wish i could talk bigF out of his shell and be out in the open for a change.. i think he's just made himself too comfortable in that shell of his right now. (make a note: find ways to crack that shell..)
* talked with honey J-Iloilo... damn.. wish you were here... (or i was there) hehe...

Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: rainbow connection ; )

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May. 25th, 2003 01:47 am To My Lives...

im sorry that what i have to offer is not much.
i long to say it'll be ok, but i myself am doubtful.
in the gloom of our misery, we must cling to the hope
of catching our ray of light.
though fleeting, this ray of light, it is always
a sure sign of a warmth and brightness behind the gloom.
way beyond the reach of misery's storm. take heed
and catch the light.

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